day 23

Didn't do too much today except for go to Shakespeare & Co, which was amazing and surpassed my expectations. There's SO many books, and I started getting overwhelmed, because I want to read them all and know all of the knowledge within them, AND because I think about how I want to be cultured and read books and watch plays and movies, AND because I think about how I want my kids to be cultured and know 10 different languages and all about their world. I played piano upstairs too. :) It was nice to play. And I took pictures. There was this little area where people from around the world leave notes (lots of Korean ones for some reason!) and I left a note that was a mix of English, Japanese, and French. :)

Then I went home and took a nap for 2.5 whole hours. I kinda feel like I wasted time not doing anything grand, but then, it's hard when everyone has different agendas and can't get their shit together and plan stuff together. Plus I felt REALLY tired and wanted to take a nap, and I also felt inspired to write and was intending to write (but didn't and am writing now.)

I really miss singing and dancing here. You think it wouldn't matter but it does. I need the release. It's so weird not singing. Like, I can sing to myself, and that helps, it really does. But I can't dance to myself haha. I want to go clubbing or something so I can just let that shit out.

I also miss SPOP a little bit, not because I'm FOMOing over this year or anything (cause I'm honestly 100% not), but because it's summer and hot weather and my body remembers that the last time it was hot like this, I was spopping away. Call it temperature memory. Also how big dancing was to me that summer, with SPOP modern and SPo you think you can dance and SPaerobics. (Sorry this doesn't relate to France. tangent...)

I love the people here, for the most part. Everyone's so fun. I really do wish we had more time to just hang out and get to know each other better. I think that's one downside of not living in the dorms. I had to sacrifice some of my fun-hanging-out-making-friends experience in order to have the French home experience. (Is this what it feels like to commute? Ugh.)

One change is that I've started thinking about going back a lot more than I did the first two weeks. In the beginning I was always thinking about what I was gonna do the next day, what new things I was going to see, etc. I was immersed in my current experience, and my life in CA was pushed to the back of my mind. Now I think about things from CA all the time: the music I listen to, my friends, experiences from last year, thoughts about the coming year, etc.

I feel a little torn, because I love summer and don't want it to end (who doesn't), but at the same time I miss Irvine and people and so it will be good to return to them....BUT again at the same time, when I come back everything will be different. School will be 100% different. Some friends will still be in Irvine, but not attending school, some will be across the country in jobs/grad school, and some will be back at home. It'll be tricky to get used to. I'm not particularly excited for next school year at the moment (more like scared and dreading the stringent teaching cred requirements) but hopefully that will change when I go back to Irvine and get back in the flow of things.

I'm sorry, I guess this isn't much of a France blog, haha. I got led astray. But, at least, this is what's on my mind. More France blogging when I do some more interesting things (Versailles and Eurodisney this weekend!)